And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
