My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
