I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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