Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize