When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
