who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
