I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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