he thought i was a dude.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize