i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
someone owes me an orgasm
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
My pussy is not your playground.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
