when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
It's never too late to be topless.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Randomize
