I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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