it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
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You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
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I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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