ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize