i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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