Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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