fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
