so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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