i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Randomize
