i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
