We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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