Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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