It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
