Whod you bang
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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