Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
