well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize