Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
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I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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