babies were throwing up all over the place
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
