WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
