Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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