im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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