If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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