I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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