You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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