is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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