Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
