Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
