Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
