it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
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