Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I am mentally ready for anal.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
