I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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