Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Randomize