im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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