I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
and i looked up. we had an audience...
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
