She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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