love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
