Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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