I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
