"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
My balls are so social today.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Randomize
