It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Randomize
