I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
